December 21 has come and gone and I still have yet to hit publish. This is due to my own personal need to make sure every little part is exactly as I want it. I am not one to mindlessly spew out material just to have a book published. I am not writing this book because I want to make money, nor am I writing it to make a name for myself. I am writing it because I love words. I am passionate about stories and unfortunately, that passion comes at a price. Some may call it anal, some may call it particular. I call it a healthy dose of obsession. I need to get this book exactly as I want it to be.
Letting it sit for a bit has been good for me. I come back to it with fresh eyes and see where my mistakes were and what my characters were really saying.
My dystopian story has been screaming at me though and I have been making notes constantly. I wake up with sentences that I have to get down on paper so as not to forget them. I am excited to move onto that story, but I know I have to finish Penance first. Penance has been my medicine. Writing it has made me feel whole. It isn’t a story about me, but the actual process of writing it has been my story. I am being who I am supposed to be with every key pressed. 329 pages. 107,101 words. Every time I see those numbers at the bottom of my screen, I feel elated and a tad overwhelmed. I will have it finished soon.
I will have it finished soon. Those words are the overwhelming ones. I have held this story for so long and it will be finished soon.